| Saturday, August 08, 2009 |
| Rhymes with "blinvisible" |
I seem to be this cliche with old friends. Out of sight, out of mind. Which is good and bad all at the same time. The good because when I am not around and come back the forget all the bad times, the drama, the other lives and things are nice. Sort of. They are stable and unassuming at the least. The bad because when I am not around I no longer exist. They forget the good times, the parties, the jokes, they kind of just forget I was there too and that, once, we all made each other happy.
I wish I had that ability sometimes. To forget. The truth is I can't. My mind keeps all that junk lying around for my memory to trip over. The good, the bad, the unbearable, the amazing, the clever, the ridiculous, the heartbreaking - all of it. Though I'll never be able to forget the way I've been hurt, I can never forget how they made me happy.
I think that's the reason why I have such a hard time letting go of anything. I'm still tied to everyone that's ever touched my life in any minuscule way. That's a whole lot of rope. And a whole lot of knots. Sometimes I feel as if there are just too many to keep track of, and I lose my grip on the important ones. There are just so many ropes in front of me that I can't decipher which is which, and the ones I really want to keep are getting lost in the tangled mess.
And because of this I often get this overwhelming feeling that the knots aren't nearly as tight as I had always thought/wished/hoped they were.Labels: sleepless |
posted by Fucking Bingo @ 2:48 AM  |
|
|
|
